Horn Please

Published On: April 7, 2017 10:09 AM NPT By: Gunjan Upadhyay


The volume on my motorcycle horn has been gradually diminishing for the last couple of weeks and it now sounds like the feeble screeching of a malnourished child. It has the effect of making pedestrians and other motorists give me right of way – probably out of pity. I’ve been thinking of getting it replaced with a slightly louder one but I might be saved the trouble of doing all that because come 2074 BS, we, apparently, won’t be ‘allowed’ to use our horns anymore, if the cops are to be believed. 

In this day and age of social media reactions, people have been going gaga over the ‘intent’ – not efforts because that is an entirely different facet I’m going to touch on later – shown by our police and administrators. Personally, I think this initiative is doomed to fail even before it has taken off. Honestly, how naïve are we? Do we think a ban – because that’s what it is – will somehow imbue our population with the civic and road sense that we (I include all of us in this) have been lacking all this while? 

I’m all for noise pollution reduction (actually all types of pollution on our roads), but the concept of right of way is alien to us and that isn’t changing overnight. This is a city where people will overtake not from the right side but from any side that is convenient and where the concept of driving in lanes doesn’t exist. Come to think of it, thanks to the digging of the Melamchi Project even the lanes no longer exist and, in this situation, I’m afraid we simply cannot do without the horn. 

The point is that we don’t have the infrastructure for a no horns policy. Add to that the fact that there is no logical flow of traffic in Nepal especially in the smaller roads and the case for horns – pun intended – becomes louder. Yes sure, we would like to be cultured and civilized and use the horn as a last resort – like most western countries – but I’m afraid we are nowhere near considerate enough. That goes for me, you and, most of other motorists who have been marinating in this system for far too long now for this sort of an abrupt change. 

What do you as a motorist (including motorcycles) do when you see someone crossing the road or a vehicle trying to come out of a side road? A good proportion of us speed up as opposed to slowing down and letting them pass. But then what are we supposed to do? People cross the road when they feel like doing so and all they have to do is wave their hands like it’s some divine magic wand that is supposed to make traffic stop miraculously. The problem is once you give right of way you will probably have to wait till the cows come home to make a move. Again, in this scenario, there’s nothing like a little bit of honking to get folks to speed up or alternatively, wait for their turn to cross.  

I’ve been driving with my excuse of a horn these past few weeks and I can tell you it is effing infuriating. Before anyone judges me, I’d like to clarify that I use the horn very infrequently partly because it infuriates my wife even more than me. Being both a driver and a motorcycle rider around Kathmandu, I can say that honking does help a great deal especially when you consider the fact that people listen to music on earphones when driving or riding. It makes them aware that you are near and, considering the ‘it’s my own backyard’ attitude people have to using and parking on our roads, horns really are an indispensable part of our travels.  An Indian tyre advert put it rather appropriately in their tagline – ‘The streets are filled with idiots’. They truly are and our horn is the only instrument that we have with which to express displeasure or frustration with someone – an outlet for our road rage.  

On the flip side, one can understand why this rule is being resorted to. Even though it puts us somewhat ‘responsible honkers’ at a disadvantage, it is really meant for those deaf idiots who incessantly honk on the move and sometimes even resort to it collectively to pressure our traffic policemen at various junctions around the city. I suppose, unlike what could be done with Ma Pa Se, there cannot be a sensible policy of maximum or minimum limit to honking so there has to be some sort of ban on it. But even when we consider this ‘logic’, its implementation will be an altogether different story. 

How in the world are our cops going to enforce this rule? This isn’t like other traffic infringements because the act of pressing a horn is instantaneous and momentary in nature so our cops will probably have to resort to enforcing it selectively. What they will do is arbitrarily pick and choose who gets to cough up money and go to one of their daily shows near Singha Durbar. Basically, if you’re caught, you are in trouble is what we are looking at.   

The police have made it a habit to successfully tackle one problem after another but if this particular initiative isn’t going to be enforced uniformly one has to question if it isn’t going to be just another revenue boosting activity for our cops? Now that fines from other traffic violations slowly dry up either due to improved motorist behavior, increased police presence or other factors, it is plausible that this exercise will morph into one big fine collection campaign. Well, one thing is for sure – our police seem bent on tackling the proverbial bull by its horns. Call me pessimistic, but I won’t be expecting my ears to get any respite any time soon.  
 
The writer loves traveling, writing, and good food when he is afforded an escape from the rat race. He can be contacted at gunjan.u@gmail.com


Leave A Comment