The essence of a woman

Published On: March 10, 2017 01:05 AM NPT By: Kalu Maila


& how a man can appreciate it more
It’s ironic that we have to wait for a day every year to celebrate the achievement of women. When we look at our mothers, wives and sisters, we are amazed by their multi-tasking skills. My mother is a great cook and so is yours. You can go to the best Thakali restaurant in the city but their food can never beat the dal bhat and tarkari your mother makes. 

I still have the caps, sweaters my Mom made for me when I was a kid. Maybe, someday when I have a kid, I can gift it to the little one or who knows my mother just might make a new one for her grandkid. My mother is a strict disciplinarian. My father was calm and cool. Mom was more like if you mess up in school or even outside then face the wrath of Goddess Kali. I still remember my Mom smacking me in the head when she found out that I was practicing my smoking skills when I was in high school. 

And during the final year, I bunked school for a week. The school did not take any action but let me off with a final warning. My mom, on the other hand, took action without even warning me. I was thrashed and then made to go to school half an hour early every day and the school guard had to call my mom to make sure that I had entered the school and stayed there instead of sneaking out from the back gate.

My sisters are independent, smart and hardworking women. They have excelled in their fields and are doing pretty well for themselves. And I bet that your sisters are amazing talented people as well.

All of my sisters are fitness freaks and this has rubbed off on my wife as well. Yes, Zumba is good but I tell my wife that I will not be attending any of her classes. Yes, I am getting old and I grew up in a household where women were the majority and their votes counted when deciding on the annual family picnic venue but to be in a room with a dozen ladies and follow the instructor’s moves is difficult than visiting my dentist for a root canal.

My wife is a great woman. If I’m not out of my bed by 6 am, she pulls the blanket and throws it on the floor. If that doesn’t work, she takes the pillow and does the same. And that fails too and then she tries one of the many WWF moves she’s mastered and I’m on the floor as well. Yes, do not let your wife watch those wrestling shows on TV. It is injurious to the husband’s health.

Every year, on International Women’s Day, my sisters and my wife go out for lunch. My brother-in-law and I go out for lunch somewhere else. Yes, women do need a break once in a while and it would be nice if we, men, cooked a nice meal and did all the housework at least for a day but I guess we are just too busy doing something else. 

Many organizations celebrated the International Women’s Day in the city by organizing runs and various other programs. My wife attended two runs this year. One was the event founded by an Indian male super model which was being organized for the first time in the country. The other one was a small fun run organized by a NGO. The so-called mega event was a disaster for my wife. She found it disorganized and the folks organizing the event seem to have never organized such events in their lives. The other one by a small NGO was fun. It was small and with no super model in sight. 

The other day, my wife was showing me pictures of the Obamas. Yes, Barrack is the man. The guy used to be the most powerful person on earth until the beginning of this year. He really loves his wife. And then my wife shows me the pictures of President Trump and his wife.  Barack kisses his wife because he loves her. He holds the umbrella for her in the rain. What about Trump? No comment, please.

I tell my wife that I’m the ‘Nepali’ Obama. Well, I’m six inches shorter and I’m brown but I have the same hair style and my hair is slowly going grey. I have the same smile and ears. And I love my wife more than Trump loves his third wife. 

And come this monsoon, I will hold the umbrella for her whenever we are taking a walk in the neighborhood and will hire a professional photographer to take the picture similar to the Obamas.

But, of course, I will never be the President of Nepal or win the Nobel Prize or bag million-dollar book deals. But I will try to be a better husband who does not get mad at his wife for throwing him out of bed. I will be a better husband who does the dishes now but will also cook at least one meal a week for my wife and do the laundry once in a while. 

I will be a better husband who does listen to his wife more often and will not go on a rant for her excessive use of Facebook or infatuation with Salman Khan. I will not worry about Salman but I hope Facebook starts a new tool which will automatically shut down one’s account if they use it for more than thirty minutes a day. 

And once again, let us wish our moms, wives and sisters and if you are not married than wish your female friends a happy International Women’s Day (albeit a bit late) and we, men should also be bold for change and fight for gender equality and women’s rights and not remain silent while women are still discriminated and harassed by the society and the state as well.

The writer is a house husband who believes in changing, if not the world, the community he lives in one person at a time. Reach him at kalumaila99@gmail.com


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