KATHMANDU, June 28: I have, on countless occasions, tried very hard to understand why people try to suppress their emotion and replace it with a gigantic ego? Failure, pain, grievances, sadness and humiliation are very normal traits that represent the challenges that everyone has to face in life.
But still, there are people who feel crucified if they, at any point, display these very emotions in front of others, as according to them, to reveal their sentimental side is to tell people they are weak.
A display of hatred challenges the normal self as people who dwell on ego act unperturbed to any human trait that might threaten to expose how fake and insecure they are.
Ego talks are not just Psychology Major talks, as ego and ego-driven people are easily cited everywhere. They talk loud, they walk like they’ve just conquered the world, and most importantly, they brag about themselves to the heights of any commonly known belief and will always find fault in what others do or say. As for the egoheads, survival is only about themselves and for them the fight for superiority is their patent royal league.
Interviewing many women who have been battered by their husbands, the one thing common to their statement is that alcoholic husbands always rant about how imperfect their wives are! Perfection freaks? Is this a trait of ego as well? The rice is cold, the rice is hard, the rice is undercooked, the rice is overcooked, the rice is not served properly, and the rice isn’t cooked in the right temperature!
The rice example explains how egomaniacs try to taunt their families with regards to things that most people consider to be topics where discussion isn’t required.
But not for ego-driven people. They will make it a point that every minor detail is brought to the scanner and they will humiliate publicly and verbally to show that they are always right and a mistake according to them needs to be brought to book.
Why do people get verbally humiliated if they oppose the ego-heads’ call for justice? The answer is simple. In the world where ego-driven people only recognize their face as superior, opposition makes them insecure and often makes them feel the quake which makes them fear that they are losing grips. And then starts the drama session – loud voices, screaming, breaking things, verbal accusations, and most importantly, history calls!
People who wear their ego as a medal often tend to talk about what they have done in the past and would take pleasure reviewing their glory details, as for them anyone and everyone is an audience. These people would often recall mistakes being made by people who oppose their views and try to defame them and often tell them how characterless they have been and pinpoint on various events which may be shameful to the person.
Deep dark thinkers, pessimistic pans, hot-tempered boilers, temperamental fools, sadistic beasts and people who believe in ‘I’ often make it to the list of people who are likely to get married to ego.
Is there a cure? There is, but my question is, will people who are more comfortable with living in the shadow of a lie, not even trying to find a rational inch to their life, seek a cure?
That’s the thing. People with ego problems don’t recognize their situation as a problem, but for them it’s a shield that protects them and they often misinterpret the temperamental protégé as ‘guidance’. Frankly speaking, for many, ego is a Viagra that lends confidence! But for how long can ego sustain an individual’s life? And in global dynamics, is ego a vital asset?
We’ll find a zillion cosmetic products to beautify the outer preface but if the inner preface is all manicured with self-praises and if the inner self ignores the presence and vibes of others, then it’s a pity to pass on the verdict that a person who’s ruled by ego is a unproductive cabbage, who may attain success, but the question again remains – For how long?
Ayush Joshi is a radio producer who dreams of becoming a psychologist and a published writer.